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Conflict Triangle Coaching

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Session Outline
Key Learning Outcomes


In workplace many conflicts can escalate due to conflict triangles which end up as victim triangles.  These dynamics consist of the alleged perpetrator, victim/target and rescuer/facilitator.  If the triangle is negative all become victims of a dispute.  With coaching each party can learn processes and skills that lead to clear communication with the other, personal reflection,  accountability and healing the rift or conflict.   If conflicts are left to worsen then they can escalate and toxicity can expand more conflict, isolation and bullying behaviours.  This process is available in workshop for groups to practice.  Refer to Facilitating Transformation Conflict.

Moving out of victim consciousness moves all into a new situation of greater harmony with life.  Letting go of being a victim means moving towards being a proactive creator of your own outcomes.  This is a unique process of parties directly resolving their own conflict. It is a process they can utilise in future situations.

The coach is a facilitator and assists all 2-3 parties (perpetrator, victim/target, rescuer/facilitator) to become clear about how they can enable an escalation of conflict and how they can facilitate their own solutions and resolution through addressing the issues in a proactive process where they take responsibility for the conflict and discover ways to resolve it.

Susan Carew, as the facilitator, works directly with conflict parties keeping them on track with the process, answering any questions and allowing them to work through the conflict until they are completely satisfied. In many processes people look for negotiated settlements, to really dissolve conflict it must be faced in a positive way and then dealt with.  This can be used with bullying problems in the cases where those bullying are unaware that they bully, became stressed or are in an unquestioned pattern.  If the perpetrator who is bullying is controlling and rigid in their beliefs, refusing to take responsibility and not interested in change then this process will not work for them.  It is for those open to change.

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Session Outline

This is a combined list for both the perceived perpetrator and the target.

  1. The courage to face a situation
  2. Learning about choices
  3. Speaking clearly about the situation
  4. Reflective listening
  5. Understanding beliefs and stuckness
  6. Taking responsibility
  7. Deciding the type of person you are
  8. The willingness to change
  9. Undertakings
  10. Seeking redress
  11. Win/win outcomes

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Key Learning Outcomes

  • Learning to listen and reflect back to another person.
  • Learning to speak the truth and understand the process is a part of healing.
  • Learning to actively listen and the accuracy of understanding in feeding back.
  • Learning that there is more than one perspective and developing empathy for the other.
  • Learning about their own beliefs, values and behaviour and how it impacts on others.
  • Learning to take responsibility for actions, inaction and personal beliefs.
  • Learning that both can be empowered through clear communication with the aim of resolution.
  • Learning to no longer live in denial, defensiveness and see conflict as an opportunity to discover one’s own power.
  • Learning that change and conflict leads to understanding, growth, empowerment and happiness.
  • Learning to heal relationships.